Adult children bring their mothers enormous pride and joy when they are engaged to be married. The planning for the mother of the bride and groom outfits begins once the rush of the amazing news subsides. Mother of the bride and groom outfits should be comfortable, well fitted and age appropriate, and can be coordinated with the color, theme and style of the wedding party. Mothers matching their gowns has been routine for several years. Attending other weddings, reading wedding magazines and visiting bridal attire shops can start the process. Having a thought in mind as to style preference when starting the search may also be a good idea.

My son recently was asked to attend as best man in in one of his friend's weddings. The mother of the groom was upset throughout most of the planning stages for the wedding because not all her ideas were put to use. The bride's mother attempted to join the groom's mother in the shopping process for their outfits, however the groom's mother had no interest.. The bride's mother selected her outfit choosing as her mother of the bride outfit an elegant, stylish and flattering gown. She looked pleasing and was a compliment to the entire wedding. The groom's mother chose as her mother of the groom outfit the same dress as the bridesmaids, but in a slightly different hue. Unfortunately, the outfit was not age appropriate or flattering to the groom's mother and she spent one of the most wonderful days she would ever have feeling sorry and ridiculous.

Some insights. When shopping for a mother of the bride or groom gown, make sure to ask the bride if she has anything in particular in mind and if possible, take her along for fittings and to help select what she may want you to wear. She ought to have input if she and you want it, but do not hesitate to speak up if the gown she prefers is unflattering or cost is an issue.

Department stores have designated mother of the bride and groom sections. Keep in mind you don't have to purchase your gown from a specialty dress shop. Department stores sell formal dresses for special times of the year and unique occasions. Guaranteed, those outfits will be lower priced than a suit in a specialty shop.

If, however, the bride has chosen something special in a particular store, you may want to seriously consider her choice. If price is an issue, remind her that you are on a budget and look for something similar. If she still insists, then compromise becomes the solution. This is the bride and groom's special occasion and it requires cooperation and support from the mothers of the bride and groom. Once you feel the love and happiness on this day, every hassle will be forgotten and you'll be the happiest mothers of the bride and groom ever.

The wedding my son was in made me realize that the day belongs to the bride and groom, not me. I will help them. I will offer suggestions if it's requested, hold my counsel if it's not. I will even let them decide on the mother of the bride and groom outfits so as to not mortify them as their friend was embarrassed. Remembering that this is the bride and groom's day and not anyone elses may be the most important lesson to come out of my children wedding day.

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